As I contemplated what to write about for this month's entry, I was torn between topics to the point of not knowing what to write about at all. As the end of this month drew closer and closer, the more torn and empty I became. Then, something starting stirring inside, telling me what to pen, but I still wasn't sure, at least, not until . . . not until the following text came in the day before the month ended:
"Hi Katrina . . . I was just moved to tell you how much I appreciate you and love you! I hope that you are having an amazing day!"
A couple of months ago, I wrote about how necessary it is to be honest and truthful in relationships, but the truth is that whenever we talk or think about being honest and truthful in relationships, what we often have in mind is how necessary it is, in spite of how awkward or uncomfortable it may be, to be honest and truthful, particularly when we're unhappy, unsettled, or displeased about something concerning the other person or something going on in the relationship. But what about when it's the exact opposite? What about being honest and truthful when we're happy, settled, and very pleased? For some, this may also feel a little awkward and uncomfortable, especially if we're not in the habit of saying it, but being honest and truthful also means letting those dear to our hearts know unequivocally that we love them, appreciate them, and are happy and thankful that they're in our lives.
Let's not take people for granted or take for granted that they just know how special they are and how much they mean to us. The people in our lives need to hear us say it, and, honestly, we need to hear ourselves say it, too. When tragedies occur around us, we're more inclined to affirm our love and appreciation for others because at those times, we're reminded of how fragile life can be and how quickly things can change. We tend to kiss a little longer and hug a little tighter, and we should. But the true test is when there's nothing particularly special, eventful, tragic, or out-of-the-ordinary going on; when we're not extra-happy or extra-pleased; or when the relationships are not overwhelmingly bubbling over. The true test is when things are pretty ordinary, routine, and mundane; when we're just chugging along; and when our relationships are pretty much the "same-o', same-o'" status quo. Will we take a moment to either look our loved ones in the eyes, pick up the telephone, or send a text message to simply say, "Hey, I just want you to hear me say that I love you, I appreciate you, and I'm glad you're in my life"? Or will we think it and even want to say it, but then not say anything because it might feel and sound weird, because we don't know what the other person will think or say in return, or because we're too busy, too tired, or we conclude that it's no big deal if we don't?
The truth of the matter is that we can genuinely love and appreciate people whether we tell them or not because love is not, necessarily, defined by speaking or not speaking those words. But speaking those words to the ones we love can be music to their ears and the sweetest melodies to their hearts. So, the real question is why would we want to withhold that? Why wouldn't we want to give them the gift of hearing us say it, in spite of how awkward and uncomfortable, how busy or tired, or how unnecessary we may feel or believe it to be? So, let's do something right now. And I know you know what's coming. Whether our husbands, our wives, our children, our parents, our sisters, our brothers, other family members, our friends, our colleagues, and the list goes on . . . let's start singing! Let's make music, and let's craft melodies! There's power in agreement, so let's agree, right now, to let the special loves of our lives know, as best we can, just how much they mean to us and just how much they matter. And let's not sing just one song and then stop. Let's keep on singing. After all, true love never dies, so let's keep singing and singing until the music and the melodies keep ringing in their ears so that they'll still hear them even when we take a break from singing or when we just can't sing anymore.
Like you, Katrina loves seeing people in healthy relationships (with themselves and others) that they genuinely enjoy and not just simply tolerate. This blog is dedicated to achieving that vision.